Es un ciclo

Let's be honest, I was facebook stalking today (like every day in a college student's life). I was doing some study abroad stalkage and am currently giggling over how the cycle continues, how it will continue, and how THANK GOD I'm over the initial shock and impact of life in and away from the infamous Maximo. What does this mean? It means the little chickabees who just got back from Nica are crying over how they're not there anymore. Just like we were, obviously. And oh how much the U.S. sucks, etc etc. Five months later here I am: still in touch with los necios chavalos, my closest SITers from the trip, and occasionally spamming our fearless leader with email. But as a wise gringa explained to me, Nicaragua is much more than from the panederia to Jicarito, or even the various places we went. We lived in a bubble, no matter how much we spiced it up.

When I was there, I fell in love with something beyond MT's laughter, or Luis's stupid songs, or even weekly dances at Chaman/Ache/Marcelo's/wherever. It was something better than riding in the back of a pickup truck for 45 minutes through the mountains, better than star gazing at the dock in Orinoco, better than stolen kisses in the darkness courtesy of Union Fenosa. And that, my friends, is why I'm going back. To find out why I'm in love.

Si pequeña es la Patria, uno grande la sueña. - Ruben Dario

brainstorming

Okay troops, I know you're out there, so let's start brainstorming fundraising ideas I can execute in the next month and a half:

- personal fundraising, which I've already spammed some of you with
- tapping friends for corporate sponsoring (note to self: contact the H brothers)
- arranging a neighborhood poker tourney - I was inspired when I won at Texas hold'em at Steve's last night. I've NEVER won big before! It's a sign.
- working with Alex for $$$ from her foundation - if I can swing it for personal funding, I won't need to do anymore fundraising for my own behalf. However, even if it can only go to general funding for MPI that's still fantastic.

If you can think of anything else, please leave suggestions/sugerencias. Gracias!

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On a completely unrelated note, words that send a shiver down my spine whenever the nica boys say them: tranquila, mujer, la china/chinita, la + any female's first name, entonces, and whenever they sing that stupid song about exorcising demons from my body.

I'm in love with an entire country. Como sucedio eso?

Lazy days

I'm a little more calm now, sorry about the blow up. Some random thoughts:

- Talked to the infamous Kate D today. I miss her oodles.
- Also gchatted with Luis all day today. He's ridiculous.
- I need to make a lot of appts before I leave, which should happen like...now.
- Need to make a poster about Manna Project.
- Need to clean room.
- Need to fundraise.

Also, finished up at Emory with a cumulative 3.756. Not amazing for a fairly easy Humanities degree, but not too shabby either. Needless to say, that's getting rounded up to a 3.8 in me head.

Rant

Changed my mind...my kids will grow up in the plains of Africa if it means they don't end up like the spoiled, rude, self-entitled brats that live in my town. Dios mio.

People may rag on Emory-ites for being rich and obnoxious, but while I was there I surrounded myself with intelligent, interesting, and caring young adults from a range of socioeconomic and ethnic backgrounds. At least there's diversity. Come to think of it, same thing goes for my high school.

Maybe I'm not giving them the benefit of the doubt, but when you don't greet someone when you're in their home and leave your used glasses all over their house, I don't care if you're the fucking king of Siam or Juanito from La Chureca. Have a little courtesy.

And no, I do not want to buy you alcohol. You don't even know my name, and I don't really care if I learn yours either.

differences

When I was in nica last semester, I kept on marveling on how "real" everything felt. Somehow the dirt and the crowds and the animals and the smells and the trash (yes, even the trash) made me feel more alive. When I came home, the first thing I noticed was how sterile everything seemed. Everything is clean and orderly and has its place. Recycling in the blue bin and trash in the green bin. The other day I was walking between the DUC and Cox, and realized that something was off. It took me a minute to realize that the paths hadn't been swept in the past day or so and leaves had fallen on the brick. How sad is it that details like that catch my attention?

But of course, that's all a matter of opinion. Life here in [the pretty side of] MoCo is just as real as when we walked by stray dogs, trash heaps and piropo-ing men to get to class, or the pulperia, or to Luis's house to spend hours doing nothing. And as fun as all that was, and as fun and crazy as I'm sure Team Nica '09 is going to be, I'm pretty sure I'm going to raise my family in the United States.

For his keynote address, Bernie Marcus repeated how lucky we were to be living in the United States. The girl beside me snorted, "He's a Republican, huh." But instead of agreeing with her, I instead found myself agreeing with him. He's right, you know. That's why my family moved back. That's why we have thousands (millions) of undocumented immigrants entering the States yearly. The only reason I would permanently move to a less developed country (say, back to the PI) is if I were offered an amazing job or if there were family-related reasons. That's pretty much it.

I called Fitness First today. It would be $130 for a 2-month student membership. Not only is that not great to begin with, but it's also 23% of a month's expenses with Manna. Not okay. I could eat for a month with that money. *sigh* Guess it's back to running the surrounding neighborhoods!

My references

Why Admissions should hire me when I apply for a job (after Nicaragua) because the economy is down the toilet and I can’t get a job in D.C.:

“ Maddie recruits 75% of the kids that go to Emory.”

- David N, junior in high school

Thanks buddy :o) On another note, about 60 hours until commencement stuff starts. Crazy!

Recap

My apologies for my awful lack of posts over the last month. Ever since I killed my keyboard I’ve been doing most of my computer stuff in the library, and I always feel guilty when I’m not doing school work. However, I’ve decided that I’m going to suck it up and write something lengthy on my malfunctioning keyboard (be proud).

The last few weeks have been a whirlwind – everything I do is bittersweet: last undergrad classes ever, last Wonderful Wednesday, last chapter, last No Strings Attached concert, last trips to various venues in Atlanta (well, at least for the time being)…and every time I see people I have to remind myself that it might be the last time we’ll see each other ever. How depressing.

You know those people that might not necessarily be your close friends, but you have friend crushes on? I might miss those people the most because I know from experience that the people I’m the closest to will always be a part of my life in one way or another. But that cute guy I flirt with a few times a week, or that really sweet girl who randomly does nice things for people, or even that faculty/staff member who lets me loiter in their office whenever I want …they’re all lovely, but I will probably never see them again. Jean, obviously this doesn’t include you :oP

On the upside, I am SO EXCITED about Nicaragua…when you’re trolling my blog months from now and I’m disillusioned and whiney about things, please remind me of my initial excitement. You see, every time I get an email from the current PDs or from the people in my team, I get all flushed and happy. I don’t have any disillusions about changing the world or saving lives, but I can’t wait to go back and have Nicaragua change me all over again. It’s a selfish venture, really. And the more I talk to people, the more I realize how much help is still needed within our own borders. After working with the people at Caminar Latino this year, I’m hoping to work more closely with the immigrant community in the States when I get back.

Lots of other stuff going on, but I’ll save that for another day.

Almost needless to say, I haven’t been exercising or eating very healthily because of all the craziness happening. When I’m having fun I tend to not be healthy…whoops.